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Joke of the Day

"My 'home to pants off' speed ratio is unparalleled."

"Your hips may not lie but your pushup bra is a sociopath."

"What's the difference between a bumble bee and someone with allergies? One is a pollinator. The other is a pollen-hater."

"If you complain about not being able to find your boyfriends name on a keychain that store will think you have a boyfriend"

"There's a hole in the nudist camp wall... The police are looking into it."

"I told my dad I felt tired. ""There's a nap for that."""

"Seven days without food... Makes one weak!"

"Spanish: The h is silent English: Many letters can be silent French: All letters are meaningless, every living thing is born without reason"

"When an avocado and a duck mate, what sound does the offspring make? Guac!"

"I started microfinancing my money to get better savings. It just made a lot of cents to me."