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Joke of the Day

"Everytime someone cuts me off in traffic, an angel gets its wings Because I'm going to kill a motherfucker."

"What do you call a big pile of kittens? A meowtain."

"What do you call the 1 yard line at the Super Bowl? ...A running play - Obviously..."

"There are two types of people in this world Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data sets"

"The next President of the United States of America, Donald Trump."

"A retarded kid, chemo patient, and midget walk into a candy store... [And walk out with jawbreakers bigger than their heads!](http://imgur.com/HwGG6mm)"

"My dream woman has a special combination of inner and outer beauty and is, most importantly, too naive to know she's way out of my league."

"Ellen Pao's front teeth"

"Don't tell them but... I write horrible things about illiterate people."

"2013 is the first year since 1987 to have 4 different numbers... carry on."