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Joke of the Day

"Two peanuts were walking down a dark alley... one was a-salted"

"What do you call a Jewish baby in the womb? A bun in the oven."

"What would Kim Jong-Il be doing if he was still alive today? Scratching at the lid of his coffin."

"A doctor reaches into his smock to get a pen to write a prescription and pulls out a rectal thermometer. ""Oh, damn it,"" he proclaims, ""Some asshole has my pen"

"Why did the pregnant woman love to tell jokes? Because she had a pun in the oven!"

"It's hard to explain a joke to a kleptomaniac... ...because he takes things literally"

"Q: What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on him? A: Nothing. He just let out a little wine."

"How do you get down off of an elephant? You don't, you get down off of a duck."

"I say I want a gf but I don't even know what I'd do with one. Do you just kiss her and leave her alone in a corner? How often does it eat?"

"What did the gay deer say after leaving the bar? I can't believe I blew 50 bucks back there!"