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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a Jewish baby in the womb? A bun in the oven."

"What kind of bees give milk? Boo-bees."

"Husband: [sends text] We need to break up. Wife: [sends text] WTF! Husband: [sends text] Sorry. That was meant to go to someone else."

"I really hope to die as peacefully as my grandfather did. Nothing like his passengers, though. They must have been losing their minds before the plane hit the trees."

"To silence her critics who hail her as Satan, Hillary is set to launch a new post-apocalyptical video game after winning the election! It's called President Evil."

"There are four states of matter: Solid, liquid, gas, and black lives."

"I'm not schizophrenic, but he is (points at nothing)"

"What's Bill Cosby's favorite part of the house? The roof."

"If you look at the number of mosques there are in London.... If you look at the number of mosques there are in London you can only come to one conclusion: Jesus is **** at Monopoly."

"A man goes into a library and asks for a book on chlamydia. The librarian says, ""You're girlfriend already has it, she said that she gave it to you."""