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Joke of the Day

"Every mirror is a vanity mirror."

"A constipated man walks into the doctors office. The doctor tells him he's full of shit."

"You might think you're smart until you try using someone else's microwave."

"Chuck Norris doesn't play god. Playing is for children."

"Airplanes: offering you the comforts of gas station food/drinks at popular night club prices"

"What is Forest Gump's email password? 1forest1"

"TIFU by taking the wrong baby home from the hospital Oops, wrong bub."

"What's the best part about sex with 28-year-olds? There are twenty of them.."

"Mom: how's therapy Me: ok. my anxiety is better Mom: great Me: yeah Mom: Me: Mom: so did u get the article I sent u about the flesh eating b"

"phd thesis: the amoumt of property damage depicted in a action movie is directley proportional to its budget"