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Joke of the Day

"phd thesis: the amoumt of property damage depicted in a action movie is directley proportional to its budget"

"I run a support group for sex addicts They're all in the other room sitting in a circle... OH MY GOD"

"CAT VAMPIRE: let me in! ME: ok CAT VAMPIRE: you fool! now I will suck your bl- ME: *closes door* CAT VAMPIRE: ... CAT VAMPIRE: let me out"

"I asked my secretary if she new the difference between a blow job and lunch she said no, so I offer to take her out to ""lunch""."

"Mom asked me if I would pick up some things for her at the 'Dime Store', great, now I've got to go all the way to the 70s."

"Joseph confronts Mary... Joseph: ""Mary, I've heard you've been prostituting your body through the town!"" Mary: ""Don't worry, Joseph. I was just trying to make a little prophet."""

"How to Jews travel? By air."

"My GFs family are religious which sux 1st time I stayed there her dad wouldnt let us sleep together Was a shame cuz he was very attractive"

"Inkling sounds like a baby octopus"

"My Brother had to give up Tap Dancing recently. He kept falling into the sink!"