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Joke of the Day

"So I was fucking my daughter last night... when my wife walked in. I don't know what she was more surprised by: the fact that I was fucking our daughter or that the abortion clinic let me keep it."

"Teacher and Student Teacher: Whoever answers my next question, can go home. One boy throws his bag out the window. Teacher: Who just threw that? Boy: Me and I'm going home now."

"What do you call a scary prostitute? Horrifying."

"[NSFW] My favorite sex position is the JFK... I splatter all over her while she screams and tries to get out of the car."

"I can't wait for the next Oscars dead-person montage when all the celebs Joan Rivers insulted have to applaud her."

"The new and best Rock band Iron Gaben"

"what do you call a man who has a rabbit up his bum? Warren"

"Stop being so hard on yourself. You don't have to be a complete idiot. Just be the best idiot you can be."

"If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world."

"What's Bob Marley's favorite dessert? Pot pie."