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Joke of the Day

"If I can't pronounce your name after meeting you, you will from that point forward be addressed as ""bro."""

"Why was the man sent to prison after staying up all night? Because he was resisting a rest."

"A court ruled that sharing click-baits is punishable by death. What happens next will shock you."

"Is there a Twitter acronym for ""Ur screenshot tweet is really funny, but my anxiety about ur phone battery % prevents me from enjoying it""?"

"I should go outside and enjoy the amazing weather but my computer cord isn't long enough."

"There was a praying mantis in my room so I stealthily grabbed a shoe and smashed my 2nd-story window and jumped out."

"Why did the former porn actor get fired from his job as a gas station attendant? Right before the tanks were full, he would pull out the nozzle and spray gas all over the car."

"How can you instantly blind an Asian person? put a steering wheel in front of them"

"Remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else"

"A cop pulls a guy over for weaving across two lanes of traffic. He walks up to the drivers window and asks ""You drinkin'?"" The driver said ""You buyin'?"""