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Joke of the Day

"Why did the former porn actor get fired from his job as a gas station attendant? Right before the tanks were full, he would pull out the nozzle and spray gas all over the car."

"Santa, Tooth Fairy, easter bunny, a smart blonde and a dumb blonde.. are all around a $100 bill, who gets it? The dumb blonde, because the rest are all imaginary..."

"And the award for best neckwear goes to... Well, would you look at that...it's a tie."

"What did the officials say whenever systematic punishment was banned? There's no punchline."

"Paradox Corporation just opened. They're doing everything they can to go out of business."

"What did one bunny say to the other bunny? ""There's a sale on at the carrot store!"""

"I love everything about writing except the part where you want to kill yourself, which is all of it."

"Waiter there is a bee in my alphabet soup ! Yes sir and I'm sure there is an A C and all the other letters too !"

"Egyptian fisherman what did the egyptian fisherman say to the other egyptian fisherman after his wife had died? I'm in de-nile"

"I don't understand how anyone could be a grave robber. How do you steal a six foot hole?"