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Joke of the Day

"When someone says ""but i thought..."" in defense Well, a guy thought that shit is a sugar so he shat into his cofee. How did that help him, hm? Props to my dad for this one."

"Where do you put a Jew with ADHD A concentration camp."

"Hey Dad, The airport called, if you don't turn down your TV, they're filing a complaint."

"A philosopher says to the linguist... ""What if, instead of periods, woman had apostrophes?"" The linguist replied, ""They'd be more possessive and have more frequent contractions."""

"What is a moo hoo for steak that came late? Filet delay!"

"A sandwich walks into a bar And orders a drink. The bartender says : ""sorry sir, we don't serve food""."

"I like my women how I like my light bulbs... Not too bright, easy to turn on and hanging from electrical wire in my basement."

"baby proofing your house is easy, just lock your doors. There's no way they could get in unless there were like hundreds of them or somthing"

"I just can't wrap my head around decapitation."

"What did the man say when his boss asked him to deal with some potassium? K."