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Joke of the Day

"I didn't see you at the camouflage competition private. ""THANK YOU, SIR"""

"Why did the European businessman sleep on the streets? To avoid a hostel takeover."

"For father's day, I took my father out. Now I don't have to remember to wish him."

"I hate it when people go round quoting the bible. I haven't even read it yet, but somehow folks think it's cool to give key plot points away"

"The female stink badger has 12 potent smelling nipples.. dozen tit make scents"

"Two gallons of milk sat within a fridge One was spoiled and the other was chocolate. Where did the spoiled milk sit? On the top shelf. Where did the chocolate milk sit? In the back."

"Having swords for arms was a terrible first wish but it was a genie and I blurt weird things out when I panic."

"When I found out my girlfriend was having a baby my life really changed. specifically my name, address and phone number."

"How is Chinese airport security like a Russian woman? They'll fuck anybody with an American passport. I say this from experience."

"Ebola is in Dallas? At least the Dallas Cowboys don't have to worry about it. They can't catch anything."