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Joke of the Day

"I hate it when people go round quoting the bible. I haven't even read it yet, but somehow folks think it's cool to give key plot points away"

"When I was younger, I used to feel like I was a man trapped in a woman's body Then I was born. (Source: sickipedia)"

"*Leaves home for the day... *Fears I left something behind *Runs inside to see baby playing with my phone. *Grabs phone & leaves."

"What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer."

"What do they call the pun masters of the streets? Punksters"

"When my child is born I'll paint flames on him so when I stand with the other parents at the nursery I can say ""Thats my son. The fast one."""

"With all of this technology, you would think we would have exercise equipment that simulated scenes from Jurassic Park to actually motivate my ass to run."

"are vegans allowed to play Duck Hunt"

"My friend asked me to make a joke about Yttrium. All I had to say was ""Why?"""

"I've just bought a house with period features She hates that nickname."