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Joke of the Day

"Ebola is in Dallas? At least the Dallas Cowboys don't have to worry about it. They can't catch anything."

"My dick was in the Guinness book of world records Then the librarian asked me to take it out"

"What's the difference between a new golf ball and a spoilt child? One's white and shiny, and the other is shite and whiny!"

"I have no respect for mules. Everything they do is half-assed."

"Whats the difference between Eminem & Slim Shaddy Eminem would fuck you and Slim Shady would fuck you and your mom"

"I went shopping . . . I went to the supermarket to get some groceries. When I got to the dairy section, they only had one piece of cheese left. It was provolone."

"I don't know what's longer: a microwave minute or a treadmill minute..."

"What do you call a person that tells jokes to ghosts? A comedium."

"*Puts air guitar back in air case* ""Listen if you wanted a ""real guitarist"" maybe you should put that in the ad!"""

"New drugs? Look them up on trip advisor!!"