61572

Joke of the Day

"Whats the easiest way to annoy someone?"

"Prank: put a bucket of water on top of the door, then shoot your roommate in the stomach. When the cops come, they get soaking wet!"

"I don't know why they call them drug deals... That shit's expensive!"

"What do you call an aging actor who has finally paid off his house? Mortgage freeman."

"Is Santa Clause real? Because the zero's on my bank statement are."

"Why did Jerry Hall marry Rupert Murdoch? He's not much to look at, but he's a great listener."

"How many forever alone guys does it take to change a light bulb? One, but he wishes it was two."

"I like my scotch like I like my women.. 12 and single."

"How many prostitutes does it take to change a lightbulb? Obviously more than four, they've been in my basement for days, and it's still dark down there!"

"What is it called when you give money to a plains bison? A buffaloan!"