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Joke of the Day

"So a Trabi owner pulls up to a gas station... ...and says to the attendant: ""Two windscreen wipers for my Trabi please."" The attendant replies: ""That sounds like a good deal!"""

"UR MOMA IS SO HAIRY THAT HARRY POTTER GOT JEALOUS."

"How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? I'm gonna need some specs or an outline of the scope, before I can get you an estimate."

"What is the difference between a sock and a camera? A sock takes five toes and a camera takes photos."

"Why'd the kid drop his ice cream cone? Because he got hit by the bus."

"*crawls out of your television and tries to kill you* I'm not like other girls."

"Dishes are like boyfriends. My roommate should really stop doing mine"

"What happens when you bring beer to a BYU party? All the girls put on their panties and go home."

"Whoa! I just looked it up and all teachers below 5th grade are actually required by federal law to use Comic Sans."

"Off to the DMV. Time for new license pic. Gonna be really drunk for it. If i ever get pulled over the cop will think i always look like that"