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Joke of the Day

"Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his monther's womb."

"Guess who I saw today? Everyone I looked at."

"All of the Apple fanboys are missing the main feature they can hold over android users Their nude pictures are automatically synced to 4chan and reddit."

"if evolution isnt real then sombody please explain how my couch has ""evolved"" to fit the shape of my butte"

"Dead Babies I hate it when I'm driving out of my garage and my next door neighbour's son stands on my way and I run over him by accident and I have to bury him in my backyard. #FuckGrammar"

"It is only when a mosquito lands on your testicles, that you realise... ...there is always a way to solve problems, without using violence."

"Me: If I have $45 and your mother has $15, how much money does your mom have? 6yo: $60 Me: That's correct, son."

"Why did the students need a ladder to get into school? It was a high school."

"How many dead hookers do you need to replace a lightbulb? Atleast not three since my basement is still dark."

"Q: Did you hear about the imaginary tree? A: It was mapleleaf."