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Joke of the Day

"What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? Dam."

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"How do you get a red wine stain off a baby?"
"What's a necrophilic pirate's favorite activity? Digging for booty."
"What's the difference between incest porn and regular porn? The mute button."
"I dated this metal chick once It was all cool for the first month, but then she started to rust."
"So I entered an astronomy contest the other day... ...I didn't come first but I did get a constellation prize. :-)"
"I don't go back to my hometown very often because I've burned too many bridges. And also because I am wanted for bridge arson."
"how do you get a dog to stop humping your leg?? pick it up and suck its dick"
"The biggest profit I made from going to was college was Selling my t9 calculator"
"Whats that smell? Auschwitz."