60495

Joke of the Day

"So Lady Gaga wears a tin foil hat and sings with Elton John and people clap I do it and you're all ""This is Barnes and Noble, please leave?"

"A bunch of black dudes were standing in front of my gardening equipment. Bros before hoes."

"Me: ""Breath mint?"" Her: ""Sure."" M: ""Don't mean to offend."" H: ""None taken."" M: ""Great. Good to hear. Care for a push up bra?"""

"Viagra now comes in a nasal spray. It's for dick heads."

"I went to the zoo today and all they had was a dog... It was a Shih Tzu."

"The government is dysfunctional and needs to be fixed I'll probably fall in love with it any minute"

"What's the difference between jam and jelly? I can't jelly my dick up your ass"

"Who so thelioma? Mesothelioma"

"Breaking news: Cartoonist found dead in his own home. The details were sketchy."

"Q. What's the difference between a line dance instructor and a dentist? A. A dentist lets you sit down while he hurts you."