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Joke of the Day

"Breaking news: Cartoonist found dead in his own home. The details were sketchy."

"Two high dudes meet... ""What's your name?"" ""Jack without a V."" ""There's no V in Jack."" ""That's what I just said."""

"[doctor's] INVISIBLE MAN: Am I cured doc? DR: Your tests are all clear IM: Is that good? DR: [talking to wrong empty chair] I'm not sure"

"Trying not to take my dog's sighing personally."

"A couple of obducents stood at the bar talking. -You Should have seen the other day. I had a beautiful lady come in and her clitoris was like a pickled cucumber. -Wow! So big? No, so salty!"

"what sorcery is this, the iron wasnt workin, so I took it apart put it together again got left with extra parts and screws but its working??"

"I was in the confessional booth today and I asked the priest if he thought it might be a good idea to stop masturbating. He said ""Sure, if it bothers you, I'll stop."""

"Pretty sure 40% of Americans would vote for a giant finger that just pointed at people and said ""Their Fault."""

"The first time I took Viagra it got caught in my throat... I had a stiff neck for HOURS!"

"Me: Shhh, your brother is still sleeping. 4yo: *runs upstairs CRASH JUMP ""Wake up!"" SLAM *runs back downstairs ""No, he's not."""