182013

Joke of the Day

"Me: ""Breath mint?"" Her: ""Sure."" M: ""Don't mean to offend."" H: ""None taken."" M: ""Great. Good to hear. Care for a push up bra?"""

"The C in Closed is open... but the O in Open is closed"

"I was mugged by an artist last night.... he drew a gun on me"

"Why did a black bear fuck a white boy to death? The casting agent took the porn's title literally."

"What time does Sean Connery go to Wimbledon? Tennish..."

"My girlfriend just said she's leaving me because of my obsession with goats. Meh."

"How do you get an anorexic chick in bed? Well, it ain't a piece of cake."

"Guess what New york is going as for Halloween? New Orleans!"

"The most popular guy in a fraternity will always end up working at a mobile phone kiosk in the mall."

"What's grey and comes in litres? An elephant. Apologies if this is a repost - heard it yesterday and had to share."