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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes i feel like the flat bread option at subway because I'm always available but no one ever wants me to hang out with"

"Men look at boobs for the same reason women look at puppies in cages. We just want to set them free and play with them."

"How is the Torah like Kidz Bop? It's for yids, by yids!"

"What do pink flamingos have on their front lawns? Plastic Italians."

"Why did 10 die? He was stuck in the middle of 9/11."

"Joke said by my little sister ""Why shouldn't you give Elsa a balloon?"" ""Why?"" ""Because she will let it go"""

"Here, take my hand. Now slap yourself with it."

"My wife and I are working on our marriage. She's more attentive to my needs and I've mostly stopped telling other women I'm a single father."

"Its a wonder how stadiums get so hot When they're filled with fans!"

"(Date) ""What's wrong?"" Oh nothing I'm just a nervous hummer ""Aw how cute!!"" *perfectly hums the entire Jurassic Park theme at full volume*"