60086
Joke of the Day
"A girl a day keeps the hand away."
Next Joke
"Why do the homies call their friend Paragraph? Because he's too short to be an essay"
"Anyway, I heard some ""Norwegian black metal"" today. Let's just say there's a reason no one ever built cities on it..."
"[during sex] Can you please take your Fitbit off."
"THEM: Hey-- ME: Ring ring. I gotta take this. THEM: I just watched you say ""ring ring."" ME: Ring ring. Yeah, this is really important."
"Everyone's switching from the iPhone 5 to the iPhone 6 for an extra inch ...I sure hope my girlfriend doesn't do the same."
"I learned what 'bukake' was last week... ...and boy, was my face white!"
"A guy goes to a five dollar lady of the night.. and he gets crabs. So, the next day he goes back to complain. And the woman says ""Hey. It was only five dollars. What did you expect? Lobster?"""
"Why does an inspiring sight like a sunrise always have to take place at such an inconvenient time?"
"What does a beer say when it's cold? Buuuurrrrrr!!!"