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Joke of the Day
"[me buying drugs for the first time] wow that's a very puffy jacket u have on"
Next Joke
"What's a redditor's favorite form of math? substitution"
"[For enemies] You know the difference between you and I? You came out of your mom. I came in her."
"Doctor: You seem to be in excellent health. Your pulse is as regular as clockwork. Patient: That's because you've got your hand on my watch!"
"I think my girlfriend might have an eating disorder I threw her onto the bed last night and my dog jumped up to retrieve her"
"Two balloons are floating across the desert One balloon says to the other, Look out for the cactussssssssssssssssssss!"
"Good news for insomniacs! Only one more sleep until Christmas!"
"And the award for the best neckwear goes to... Well, would you look at that, it's a tie!"
"if i opened my Gryffindor Would you Slytherin?"
"What do you call a Muslim Girl dating an Agnostic Guy? For safety purposes, I don't know if I should tell you her name.."