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Joke of the Day

"I think my girlfriend might have an eating disorder I threw her onto the bed last night and my dog jumped up to retrieve her"

"What did Mr. Marijuana say to Mrs. Marijuana when she asked if her dress makes her look fat? ""I'll be blunt..."""

"I knew a guy who was into sadism, necrophilia, and beastiality... But he gave it up cause at the end of the day, he was just beating a dead horse."

"[The Second Coming] Jesus:""People of the Earth! I have returned with news of God's love an-"" Voice from the crowd:""DO THE WINE TRICK"""

"What did the suave frog say to the hot frog? You're ribbeting!"

"I know all the subjects of Hillary Clinton's emails, ask me anything [Deleted]"

"I went to the zoo... I went to the zoo yesterday and I was disappointed to see the only animal they had was a single dog. It's a shih tzu."

"From the pilot during his welcome message: ""We are pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry... Unfortunately none of them are on this flight."

"which 2 insects are the most foolish? ant-ticks"

"What do you call it when a broke person makes a sex tape? A Poorno."