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Joke of the Day
"My wife made me into millionaire. I was a multi-millionaire before we met."
Next Joke
"Forget Washington, Lincoln, JFK. Trump Is Simply Going To Be The Best President To Have Come in A Melania."
"Words can't describe how beautiful you are. But, numbers can. 4/10"
"What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One I like to crush with a sledgehammer till juice squirts out, the other is a watermelon"
"You know what's way better than an iPod? A zune"
"Why is a viola solo like a bomb? By the time you hear it, it's too late to do anything about it. A long list of viola jokes: http://www.mit.edu/~jcb/jokes/viola.html"
"Buckwheat has converted to Islam He is now known as Kareem of wheat."
"Birds wouldn't be so smug in zero gravity, I bet"
"I bought shoes from my drug dealer. I'm not sure what they're laced with, but I've been tripping all day."
"TIL you can get kicked out of the Navy for getting on the wrong vessel just once. Oops, wrong sub."