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Joke of the Day

"What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground? Shoot him again."

"Brown Bell What's brown and sounds like a bell? Duuunnnggg"

"A gun is like a coupon that works anywhere"

"""and god said LET THERE BE BUTTS and there were butts nice warm jiggly butts everywhere on every human"" - me 2:16"

"Yo mama's so fat... ... that if you walk too close to her, you'll go into orbit."

"I laid back last night and admired the sky above me, taking in the beauty of the universe when it hit me... Where the fuck is my roof?"

"How many cops does it take to push a hooker down the stairs? None, ""she fell""."

"Police are looking for a man who refuses to update his PDF reader. He is described as 32, single and has no fixed adobe."

"The children of Amazon cannibal tribes think Chuck Norris is the Easter Bunny because he hides body parts for them to find every Easter morning."

"Have you ever smelled moth balls? Reply: Yes How did you manage to get between their tiny legs?"