58290

Joke of the Day

"Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl in the bathroom? Because it has a silent P!"

"Did you know you can tell the gender of an ant by throwing it in water? If it sinks, girl ant. If it floats, buoyant."

"i got you a candy necklace for a present but then something happened so i got you this string instead"

"I was watching tv with my mom & she was amazed a blind guy didn't care his son was missing & I was like outta sight outta mind am I right"

"Have you heard of the hypochondriac who had issues with his bowels? He was always full of shit"

"With abs like his, are we certain Jesus didn't just diet for our sins?"

"My dad just dropped this one on my brother and I Someone broke into the Police Station and they stole the toilet. Police are looking into it but they have nothing to go on."

"What do you call your favorite 80's pop star floating dead in the harbor? David Buoy"

"what ya doing... your mum"

"GOD: for this to work, I need them to feel love CUPID: how about I shoot them through the heart with an arrow? GOD: ur starting to worry me"