58186

Joke of the Day

"Some racists say black people are just white people that were left in the oven too long... If that's true, then all black people would be jewish."

"I think that even the most strident libertarian would agree that the US founders never envisioned the unchecked powers of the Girl Scouts."

"Why do you get arrested for walking into an army base unauthorised in the USA? Because Obama doesn't like anyone sneaking in his barracks."

"What do you say to someone riding a stoned horse? Get off your high horse."

"What's the difference between a run-down Greyhound stop and a crabby, decrepit prosititute? The first is a crusty bus station, whereas the second is an accurate description of your mother."

"A really drunk guy... A really drunk guy gets into a taxi and says ""Heeeyy cab guy, can I leave the pizza and the beer in the front seat?"" ""yeah no problem"" -BHLUAGHH-"

"Cats are just fuzzy houseplants that hate you."

"Religion is like Gym Classes Some people whine excessively about it, most don't really care and those who take it too seriously usually don't go too far in life."

"Where do cows go on movie night? To the moooovie night."

"I was in a cab today and the cab driver said, ""I love my job, I'm my own boss. Nobody tells me what to do..."" Then I said, ""Turn left."""