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Joke of the Day

"Why do you get arrested for walking into an army base unauthorised in the USA? Because Obama doesn't like anyone sneaking in his barracks."

"Did you hear about the hippie who got lost at sea? He was too far out!"

"In Russian Thanksgiving... Turkey shoots you. [Meme](https://imgur.com/SHs2Vbt)"

"What's the difference between a midget chess team and a ladies track team? One is a group of cunning little runts.... the other is a group of running little C^#@$"

"What's the difference between hardware and software? Hardware breaks if you*don't* maintain it."

"You know what they say about a guy with big feet? Big shoes."

"Live tweeting tomorrow's hangover tonight."

"I call my dick Ambidextrous Because I fuck girls left and right."

"Why doesn't Casper have any children? He has a hollow-weiner."

"There are few problems in life that can't be sorted by slowing down, taking a deep breath, and THEN drawing winged eyeliner on a raccoon."