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Joke of the Day

"I want to do an essay on chronology and hand it in late... ... so the professor can say ""it's about time!"""

"The Internet makes things so convenient. Before it existed, if you wanted to order a DVD online, you had to invent the Internet."

"What do you call a fishing hook without barbs? Debatable!"

"Early to Bed and Early to Rise proves that . The Person has no Internet Connection...;-p"

"Why did Hitler really commit suicide? He got the gas bill"

"I thought the fire alarm went off so I exited the building. It was a premature evacuation.."

"""Quinoa"" sounds like something a ninja would say before kicking you."

"So the UK Government can now read my internet history... So I guess the only way I'm ever seeing tentacle porn again is if I take a shitload of LSD and watch Spongebob. Cruel world."

"Why did the Broadway star with a tiny butt get evicted? Because he was a little behind on Rent!"

"Son: Dad, I just had sex. Dad: Good job son, sit down, we need to talk about something. Son: I can't."