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Joke of the Day

"what idiot called it becoming a zombie and not waking up on the wrong side of the dead"

"What do you get when you cross a baggage handler with a sex offender? [The TSA!](http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ2-l7xEQJqvdPPlN2qABza3Hpfin65EITfmXxRgqx4gj5ajg9mEdVJFhEsjg)"

"People call me lazy because I sleep 13 hours a day But to be fair, Jesus slept for three days straight and that started a religion."

"There is nothing worse than watching the new guy at Subway make your sandwich."

"What do they call a dog in Iraq? A Shia pet. *friend of mine came up with this and was pretty proud of himself"

"Welcome to the Psych Med Club! We were working on a secret handshake, until we lost interest in the things we once loved."

"""Wolfgang Mozart"", says Mozart's friend... ""What?!"" replies Mozart. Then they are both eaten by a gang of wolves."

"A bar walks upto a bar... Hows that even possible"

"I'm not saying we should kill all the stupid people in the world, I'm just saying we should remove the warning labels from everything and let the problem take care of itself."

"If a guy says you're hot, he's looking at your body. If he says you're pretty, he's looking at your face... If he says you're fabulous, he's looking at your brother"