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Joke of the Day

"If a guy says you're hot, he's looking at your body. If he says you're pretty, he's looking at your face... If he says you're fabulous, he's looking at your brother"

"Pizza is like sex... When its good, its really good, but when its bad, its still pretty good."

"I asked my teacher what I had to do to pass the course. He said to get 50% on the exam and give him a blowjob But I don't think I got 50% on the exam"

"I heard you can eat animals only if you're tall and handsome. This is a pussy joke."

"A horse walks into a bar. The other customers promptly get up and leave, seeing the potential danger in the situation"

"If Kevin Spacey doesn't sign his name like this Kevin E Then he's pretty damn stupid..."

"What do you call a white duck? A quacker"

"Have you ever considered shaving that beard and gluing it to your bald spot? ... Oh! You meant a question about the job position!"

"Due to my obsessive reading I have a wonderful vocabulary of words I can't use in conversation, because I don't know how to pronounce them."

"Fighting a war on drugs beats fighting a war sober"