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Joke of the Day

"How do you kill a one legged fox? Have it run across Canada. (maybe only Canadians will get this)"

"A woman goes on a fishing trip with 20 guys. The only thing she came home with was a Red Snapper"

"My books fell on my head last night.... I only have my shelf to blame. :("

"Here's another great Ellen Pao Joke [deleted]"

"Every time a magician graduates from his school and throws his hat in the air at the convocation, PETA sues him for cruelty to rabbits."

"My son can go from ""omg...you're impossible I can't wait until I'm 18!"" To ""you're the best mom ever"" in a matter of $100"

"Have you heard about President Clinton's plan to secretly bomb eastern Ukraine? He called it the ""Donetsk, Don't Tell"""

"Some call me an alcoholic, But I call myself an antisocial drinker"

"How many LAPD officers does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One to beat the bulb for being broke, another to shoot the room for being black."

"SNL contacted me about being a writer, and I was like ""Pfft. I got my own gig"" and they were like ""BEEP BEEP BEEP"" because my alarm went off"