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Joke of the Day

"Materialism: buying things we don't need with money we don't have to impress people that don't matter."

"I felt sad when my girlfriend wouldn't reply to my emails I guess that was the point of no return"

"What kind of dog sniffs out new flowers ? A bud hound !"

"Why can't Emma Watson ever play Hermione Granger again? 'Cos once you go black, you never go back."

"In the Garden of Eden... In the Garden of Eden, Eve wore a fig leaf. Do you know what Adam wore? A hole in it."

"There's 3 types of people in the world. The ones that know how to count and the ones that don't."

"What's the difference between oooh and ahh? 3 inches"

"smh, I bought tickets to Disney on ice & it was just 2 hours of Donald Duck smoking crystal meth"

"What is Bear Grylls' favourite web browser? Internet *explorer*!"

"Q: Why did Bill Clinton cross the road? A: To tax the chicken."