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Joke of the Day

"Every time a magician graduates from his school and throws his hat in the air at the convocation, PETA sues him for cruelty to rabbits."

"My parents said they liked my DNA strand model. I said, ""Thanks. It's a nice pair of genes."""

"You wanna mess with me, pal? You wanna mess with the saddest man in town? I've got a whole crew of sad boys just waiting to burst into tears"

"I used to wonder how anybody could possibly drop a cell phone in the toilet. Used to."

"Encyclopedias are just ghetto Google."

"Dad Joke Survivors A nickelodeon presentation."

"Made a friend today. Well, I knocked on my window when a guy walked past my house. I'll name him Terry."

"Dating websites I was on eharmony last night, why did it ask my height in inches?"

"Say ""I won a math debate"" 5 times really fast! Now slap yourself for being such a pervert."

"What do you call something that is half horse and half pig? A mounted police officer"