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Joke of the Day

"What's a pedophile's favorite drink? Cherry pop. See you all in hell!"

"Did you know that 50% of the Chinese have cataracts? The rest drive rincolns."

"I bet every time Vanilla sets his razor down on the bathroom sink, he looks up in the mirror, rubs his newly smooth face & says ""Shaved Ice"""

"*speaking to sandwich* honey, I have good news. you're going to have a baby brother! *starts making another sandwich*"

"I wonder if mutes ever sign ""Now that's what I'm talking about!"""

"A Japanese man observes his son scratching his knee. He comments, ""Itchy knee, son?"" The son replies, ""I already know how to count, Dad!"""

"Socialism Q. Why did the dyslexic escapologist join the International Socialists? A. because he wanted to help untie the human race."

"Teacher: ""What did the Indians bring to the first Thanksgiving?"" Student: ""Baseballs."" Teacher: ""Baseballs?"" Student: ""Yeah they were Cleveland Indians!"""

"Why is it so hard to explain metaphors to a kleptomaniac? Because they always take things... Literally"

"my yoga teacher asked me how flexible I was I told her I couldn't do Monday's."