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Joke of the Day

"""Your dad cant hold a candle to what my daddy can do."" ""Oh Ya, what does he do?"" ""Makes gun powder."""

"My head is so big... When a girl sits on my face, she has room for the remote and a snack."

"Mommy, what are these? ""Put them back they are sleeping pills!"" Oh, then you shouldn't yell ""Why?"" [whispering] YOU'LL WAKE THEM UP"

"What did the green grape say to the purple grape? ""Breathe damn it, breathe!"""

"I lost my mood ring.. I'm not sure how i feel about this."

"Do fish get thirsty?"

"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, feminists cant change anything!"

"Have you heard the one about the witch's broom? It's sweeping the valley.(That one usually floors me, but I'm going to brush it aside before I'm swept away with laughter.)"

"Guy in wheelchair spotted on Google Earth lol"

"I saw a motorcycle with a broken windscreen And I thought ""that's not fairing too well."""