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Joke of the Day

"How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They'll just beat the room for being black."

"Did you know Jesus has nice abs? He does crossfit."

"When a woman is in labor... When a woman is in labor and the pain is so unbearable, it is the closest she comes to understanding what it is like to be a man with the common cold. :}"

"Yo mama so fat the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!"

"The golf joke What's the best part about golf? It's the only activity where you actually aim for the hole under 18 and you don't go to jail."

"What did the fish say when it hit the wall? Dam"

"I saw a fight in the chip shop the other day... Two fish got battered."

"Every single person on this subway is staring at their phone and I'm so appalled I have to tweet about it."

"What does Matthew McConaughey think about an all white, Republican Government? Altright, altright, altright"

"What do you call it when a male mathematician imagines himself having an orgasm? Squirt(-1)."