55540

Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a slut and a bitch? A slut sleeps with everyone. A bitch sleeps with everyone, except you."

"""Grandpa, why did everyone make a big deal out of selfies when they're just pictures, oh and thanks a lot for doing nothing about climate."""

"What does a pedophile order when he goes to a cannibal restaurant? Eh, just something off the kids menu."

"I wish dogs had facial expressions because when he's obviously checking out my junk, I'd kind of like to know his opinion."

"How did I win a Super Smash Bros. Brawl Tournament? I met a knight"

"my family is known for always having diarrhea. i guess it runs in our jeans"

"Most people don't even know that New York was attacked by the Stay Puffed Marshmallow Man in the 80's. I saw a documentary about it."

"How would you rate USA and Saudi Arabia's relationship? 9/11"

"Today at school, my teacher said I needed to stop doing my impression of a Flamingo That's when I had to put my foot down. EDIT: some shit"

"I'm not sexist because being sexist is wrong, and being wrong is for women."