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Joke of the Day

"[Chumbawumba concert] I get knocked down, but I get up again.. [whack-a-mole just goin nuts in the crowd] ""Aw hell yeah!"""

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"On a positive note, once Trump becomes president and burns the world to the ground, our student loan debt is essentially wiped clean"
"What do you call a special needs kid who is late for class? ""tardy"""
"The US goverment EDIT: Sorry, I know this isn't fairly original. I promise better next time."
"Somewhere a village is missing its idiot. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I can't remember where I live."
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"You haven't seen a woman overreact until you've told a woman she's overreacting."
"I used to be in a band called 500Mb...... But we had to break up because we couldn't get a gig."
"What was Adolf Hitler's campaign slogan? *""Auschwitz the old, in with the Jews!""*"
"What do computers eat when they get hungry? Chips."