153870

Joke of the Day

"Hey, people who leave the volume on an odd, non divisible by 5 number, how do you live with yourselves?!"

"I went to a AAA meeting today and a guy celebrated 21 years. That is some responsible vehicle ownership."

"Here is an old joke my old man used to tell me There is a 4 year old, 6 year old, 8 year old, 10 year old, and me trying to catch a home run ball. Who gets the ball? Me because fuck them"

"Chinese parents give birth to girl [removed] Source: im a chinaman Edit: im a chinaman"

"Little brother told me this joke, genius. ""Why did Beethoven kill his pet chicken?"" -why ""Because it kept saying ""bok bok bok"""

"Attractive women with no personality are like clear skies on a 10 degree day. Looks good in pictures, but no one wants to live with it."

"What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, he wont come when you call it!"

"You know what the worlds best play on words is? Scrabble."

"This one time I swallowed a piece of string. When it came out it was all tied up. I shit you knot."

"I don't know what fool first decided to put carrots in the cake, but they sure lucked out."