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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a thirsty cow? A watermeloin.. Don't worry, I remember where the door is."
Next Joke
"What's your favorite position? Juxta"
"Why don't old men like old women? Ever tried to peel apart a grilled cheese sandwich?"
"Me: It'll just make mom grumpy, so don't tell her that the dishwa..... 4 year old: MOM! DISHWASHER'S BROKEN!"
"What is Andreev-Reflection? When electrons are reflected assholes by a superconductor."
"I like to picture my mom in the middle of the crowd at a Wu Tang concert, hands on her hips, just shouting grammar corrections back at them"
"Before having a kid the most important thing to ask yourself is ""Am I ready to watch the exact same cartoon on repeat for the next 4 years?"""
"Why Won't Anyone Tell me the Name of Ukraine's 5th Largest City? They keep telling me to stop asking..."
"""IS THERE A DOCTOR ON THE PLANE???"" [i stand up super fast & knock myself out on the luggage compartment, requiring another doctor]"
"What does a nosey pepper do? Gets jalapeno business :D Edit: Sorry, I'm not sorry"