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Joke of the Day

"You know urine trouble, when You see members of the KKK, Black Lives Matter And Westboro Baptist Church together at the RNC... They are bound to piss each other off."

"My wife gave me her Christmas list. I said, ""isn't my undying love & affection enough?"" We laughed and laughed. Now I'm at the purse store"

"How to be rich for the rest of your life... Legally change your name to ""Rich"""

"What does as electronic engineer make for breakfast? Ohmlettes"

"Want to hear about the worst blowjob I ever had? It was awesome"

"What did Matthew McConaughey say after voting for Trump? alt right, alt right, alt right"

"Him: I wonder if this dealership is open. Me: Are you stupid? The parking lot is full."

"What makes a Mexican saddest about the rise of ebooks? The closing of the Borders."

"My wife said she was hungry and told me to order food... So I got us a hooker cuz I heard great things about their seafood buffet."

"I saw a crazy squirrel today.. He was fucking nuts."