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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a vibrating cat? An ocellate."
Next Joke
"The guy who coined ""put that in your pipe & smoke it"" was probably trying to find out if something on the carpet was weed."
"Parents, talk to your kids about grammar. Forget drugs and sex, they'll learn that shit on the streets."
"In Starbucks a woman went sh*t house rat crazy when she got a double shot of espresso instead of the triple shot she ordered. I'm fine now."
"*Lexus dealership* Sales person: if you buy a new Lexus we will make the first months payment Me: so who makes the other 59 payments?"
"Went early to my Tantric Sex class last night... Was told to come later."
"Ref: I'm sending you off Player: What for? Ref: The rest of the match!"
"No matter how much you push the envelope... ...it's still stationery."
"Why do they thank me in the cafeteria when I pay for my food like I had a choice? Just tell me ""enjoy the diarrhea"" and I'll move along."
"Just told a girl who was getting too close we should just stay friens. In case you're wondering, I'll give her the d later"