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Joke of the Day

"My psychologist and psychiatrist don't agree on my diagnosis so yes, I get what it's like to have people fighting over me."

"What do you call a stock broker having sex in the middle of his work? Insid'er trading. http://i.imgur.com/oTp4lvG.gif"

"""Why aren't you wearing a coat?""""Coats are for pussies.""My mother asks too many questions."

"If Ekans is Snake backwards and Abroc is Cobra backwards... What does that say for Muk?"

"OMG IT'S GOING TO KILL US ALL!! ~ My dog every time I use a broom"

"A Pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says to the pirate, 'do you know you have a steering wheel in your pants?' The pirate says, 'Arrrrrgh! It's drivin' me nuts!'"

"Being single is nice because I don't have to repeat my mumbled gibberish in a defensive tone."

"Come on, there has got to be at least one business like show business."

"How many feet do 2 black chickens have?"

"Life... It's just an f in lie."