5404

Joke of the Day

"just ordered so much food the delivery guy gave me four sets of utensils but it's okay I still love myself"

"Some days I ask, ""What would Chewbacca do?"" And the answer is always, ""Make that gargly roaring sound."" So that's what I do."

"My boss said, ""Have a good day""... So I went home."

"How many feminists does it take to dismantle the patriarchy? None. Once they shut up, no-one has any reason left to oppress them :)"

"""Doctor! Doctor! I think I may have Alzheimers!"" ""We had this discussion last week, Mr. Smith."""

"""This is mine"", he growled passionately into her ear. ""Are we clear?"" Breathlessly, she agreed. She wouldn't try to eat his nachos again."

"Incest It's how you come into your own"

"After i walked out of the theatre from watching star wars I turned to my woman and said, ""so do you wanna chewbacca on this cakka?"""

"When I go to Starbucks, I tell them my name is Marco. When my drink is ready and they call my name, I just keep saying Polo."

"Does anyone get the urge to tweet something really bad just to see if the government is really paying attention to you?"