53

Joke of the Day

"What did the car said to the valet? I've been through a lot."

"When is Iran not Iran? When it's a rock."

"Dandelions are just like regular lions, except they wear ascots."

"My first mistake was thinking she couldn't hit a moving target."

"What do tight jeans and a cheap hotel have in common? No ballroom"

"Why does Snoop Dog carry and umbrella? Fo-Drizzle"

"leonardo dicaprio would have won 8 oscars by now if he was named after one of the cooler turtles"

"What do pink flamingos have on their front lawns? Plastic Italians."

"[hunting] DAD: dont scare him ME: did u know we dump 16 tons of sewage into our waters every minute DEER: holy shit DAD: what did i just say"

"The EU has said that more needs to be done to help the Syrian refugees, especially the children. May I recommend swimming lessons?"