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Joke of the Day

"Women are like campfires. Beautiful, hot, smell great, warm your heart. And, both don't like it if you pee on them. Mostly."

"Red head says to blonde - ""I feel so dirty.... ....I slept with a Brazilian!"". Blonde says - ""Oh, you little slut puppy, you! Hey - I forgot....how many is a Brazilian?"""

"Learning how to say ""where the hell am I?"" in eight languages. Just in case."

"Did you hear about the hunting rule change? It's a game changer."

"Where's the best place to hide during a zombie apocalypse? Radio Shack. Not even the brain dead would go there."

"The human body is 70 percent water?? *looks at a glass of water* damn girl"

"My grandpa said ur generation relies too much on technology! I said, "" no your generation relies too much on technology!"" Then... I unplugged his life support"

"Bud light is alot like sex in a canoe... It's fucking close to water"

"The main reason I lost my virginity was to ensure I wouldn't be sacrificed anytime soon."

"When done right parallel parking is a beautiful thing to watch."