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Joke of the Day

"Dont wanna cause any alarm.But hold off on the #HappyNewYear stuff.Just traveled 1 yr into the future.lets just say it went badly 4 all of u"

"I like my women like I like my cigars 7 years old and coming from Cuba in a burlap sack"

"How can you tell if Asians are good at sex ? Because out of 6 randomly chosen people, 3 will be Asians."

"A priest walks into a shoemakers shope... And says to the cobbler, ""Help! My soles need heeling!"""

"Today my neighbor knocked at my door at 3 am. Can you believe that? . Lucky for him that I was awake playing the drums!"

"- If any person believes that these 2 shouldn't be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or... - THE PRIEST ALREADY SAID THAT! - Ugh, I do."

"My friend thinks he is smart ! My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face."

"What's a pedophiles favorite type of oil? extra virgin"

"This silence is far from golden... which reminds me. I need to shower."

"A book never written: ""Secret Societies"" by E. Lumin Audi"