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Joke of the Day

"*Semi drifts into my driveway, transforms into a robot and hands me my package.* This Amazon Optimus Prime account was so worth it."

"Chemists do tell jokes, but there's no reaction because all their people skills Argon. Omg, that's Sodium funny, right? Na? Okay."

"She's as smart as bait."

"Horoscope: Slightly fatter than you were yesterday"

"Fresh and Funny! Hey Sue, what do you say to a nice walk? Oh Harry, that would be lovely! Wonderful. Could you bring me some beer and cigarettes on your way back?"

"Wanted to buy a 17th century European castle but I'm baroque."

"My wife deserved it... She didn't let me wank, I had to beat something!"

"My alarm clock isn't in a good mood... It just went off on me"

"Where do people from Laos like to swim? In Laotian."

"Why did the piglets get in trouble in their biology class? They ate all the specimens."